The tile of this post is something I say nearly every day. And not only when I’m getting dressed. See, I am so stuck. Its all because of jeans. Well, skirts are to blame too. Because everyday the choice of which to wear is a dreadful battle!
It all started with Summer. In the summer, I wore skirts mostly every day. I also wore some very modest and feminine shorts as well as a cute pair of capris. The shorts were mostly worn when it would have been very incovenient to wear a skirt- like when I was on crutches for 3 weeks. (Though I did wear skirts than!) In the Summer wearing a skirt was not very odd; as it was warm out and many people were wearing skirts. Also, my summer time skirts are a lot more modern than my winter skirts.
Enter autumn. I was so stoked about “Winter Time Femininity”. Tights, long skirts, and lots of layers. But than I realized something. NO ONE at least in Southern California, wears skirts in the Winter. No one. I have gone looking, believe me! In 5 hours of being at Wal Mart, Target, the mall, and Whole Foods- I saw 2 people. And the worst of it is; no one at my church ever wears a skirt aside from Sunday mornings.
Yes, I’m whining. But this is a really big problem in my life! Every day. Do I wear a skirt? Do I wear pants?
I feel convicted personally that skirts are more modest than pants. I suppose the Lord has put this on my heart. It is definitly a hard thing. Its hard to be the only person wearing a skirt; particualrly when you are known as being strange. I feel much more comfortable in pants. I blend in. But we are to be a light to the world. A city on a hill.
I should wear skirts. No, not in a legalistic way, but in the spirit of “Do Hard Things”. I need to not fear man. Its okay to be dressed unlike others. It is fun to wear skirts. I do feel more like a Princess, a lady, and all the other wonderful things.
For those of you who wear skirts, how did you get used to being the only one? Any tips for not fearing man so much?
Something Greater 
January 18, 2008 at 3:54 pm |
I think you should feel confident while wearing a skirt. I love wearing skirst because they make me feel feminin. I also wear pants but it is a personal preference. You need to find what makes you feel comfortable and go with that. I am a mood dresser mostly so some days I feel like wearing a dress and I do so. Good luck and just remember do what makes you feel comfortable and forget the other people that are at walmart and target and even church.
January 18, 2008 at 3:57 pm |
It is really hard deciding what to do. You should remember that the important thing is what makes you feel comfortable. I am a mood dresser and dress according to how I feel. I wear pants but that is a personal choice for me. I also love wearing dresses and skirts. I think you should think about what makes you feel good and not worry about the other people that are around you, you never know when you are the one that they are looking at as an example.
January 18, 2008 at 4:40 pm |
I definitely understand how you feel right now! 2 1/2 years ago, this was exactly where I was. I SO wanted to wear dresses for I really enjoyed them and felt more modest, lovely, and feminine in them. However, like you said, I looked around and saw no one among my friends doing such a thing! You can read more about how I switched here: http://danceranna.blogspot.com/2006/02/id-rather-wear-dress.html
One thing that really helped me was to remember that everyone has their own style and preference in what they wear. If someone asks me why I wear dresses/skirts, I simply respond, “Because I like them more!” Yes, people often think you’re weird at first, but they get used to it. After all, people always tell you to “be yourself” and if you like dresses more, it shouldn’t cause anyone else problems! When I made the switch, I thought everyone I knew would instantly demand why in the world I was wearing a skirt on a weekday – but no one did. Most didn’t even really seem to notice, and now many of the girls I know wear skirts – not all the time, but just whenever they feel like it. You can be a trend setter! =)
It is a little more common to see people wearing skirts around here throughout the year, probably because it’s warm. However, oftentimes I’m the only one in a skirt when we go places. But, that’s okay. I’ve gotten used to it. :)
Do what you feel comfortable with and what you feel God calling you to. He’ll give you the strength to do a hard thing!
January 19, 2008 at 7:36 pm |
Hi,
I TOTALLY understand what you mean! I’m still not even COMPLETELY confident with my dress and how others think of me when dressed in a skirt! But I’ve come a LONG way!! I had an especially hard time when I was in a couple different groups during my freshman and sophomore years (I’m now a senior in high school), where almost everybody wore pants and there were very few skirts to be seen. I, likewise, felt like I fit in more when I wore jeans like everybody else, as opposed to a skirt. Then, my mom switched over to wearing skirts about 3 years ago…as did a friend of hers. Their reasoning was not solely for modesty’s sake, but also to look and act more like a lady; the fact that one gets treated more like a lady is a pleasant side effect! Over time I started to wear more skirts via osmosis as I watched my mom, her friend and others, but still I felt uncomfortable with the idea of wearing skirts all the time like them. I did a WHOLE LOT of praying and only in the last 2 months have I come to a point where I decided to wear skirts/dresses most if not all of the time. It took me 3 years…but here I am! I came to this point when I found myself CONSTANTLY looking in the mirror at my backside to try and determine whether my jeans or other pants I was wearing were immodest in any way. I believe God was really trying to tell ME something! I have a wonderful brother with whom I talk often and I asked him, from his point of view, if he preferred girls to wear skirts or pants and, also, if pants were a problem. He told me that pants are not necessarily a problem, it’s just that he likes it when a girl LOOKS like a girl…when she’s wearing a skirt or dress. He also made a point of saying that it also reminds him to make sure he acts like a gentleman and to treat said girl with more respect. Don’t get me wrong, he still is a gentleman all the way, but it helps him to remember to open the door for a girl, for example. I have heard or read the opinions of a number of other guys on this issue. As strange as this may sound, hearing guy’s input on this topic encouraged me to know that they do appreciate and, most of all, respect modesty, and that wearing a skirt isn’t weird. I am also from Southern California and I can kind of relate to what you mean about girls not wearing as many skirts in the winter. Through prayer and encouragement from my mom, dad, brother (especially), friends/acquaintances as well as The Rebelution’s “Modesty Survey” (also a big help), I have come to feel more secure in who I am and what I wear. I’ve also worked to carry myself, no matter what I’m wearing, like it’s no big deal and that it’s what I am supposed to be doing in my life…as though it’s just my fashion. NOTE: If you act funny or bring special attention to the fact that you feel uncomfortable in a skirt, then you really WILL feel uncomfortable. Believe me, I have not mastered this all yet, especially when around certain people. But God has helped me SO much because He put people in my path who encouraged me in my quest to be more modest and lady-like. He also put girls like you in my path who were encouraging in the way that they not only liked skirts, but wear them often or all the time as a matter of modesty and conviction. I got to the point where I felt like God was definitely calling MY name to change to skirts, because SO many random people would be talking about it or I’d be reading about it on blogs OR it would come up in family conversation. Another thing is that you need to find YOUR style of skirt or dress…the one that fits you and your body best. I know of two skirt sites that have plenty of modern style skirts that you might like:
http://www.denimskirts.com
http://www.tznius.com
The first one has some really modern looking skirts that are cute…they come in various lengths. The latter is a Jewish site (tznius=chaste/modest) that sells pretty much floor-length skirts…which I have come to love a lot…and are cute and chic. You may find these sites to be somewhat pricey, but they are made well and they last a long time. My mom and I also think that aside from finding a cute skirt/dress…if you wear the right kind of shoes so that the combination looks cute and casual all at the same time, it really makes a difference in making your outfit look great! :)
God bless and vaya con Dios…I’m praying for you…for God’s peace and affirmation in your decision! Listen to your heart!
Shalom,
Sydney :) ;) =)
January 22, 2008 at 11:35 pm |
Yes, I struggled with this issue at one stage, but now I am completely comfortable with wearing skirts and dresses.
I have always been encouraged to wear pretty skirts and dresses, but I wasn’t told to wear them 24/7.
The change came when I wore a ‘little brown dress’ for 35 days (long story – let me know if you’d like to read the story). After that I didn’t want to go back to wearing pants!!
Now I only wear pants/shorts if I have to (ie for horse riding etc), and I always feel feminine and girly. I mostly wear long flowing skirts, as they suit me better than short fitted ones.
For me personally it was a realization that I don’t NEED to wear pants, and that life is so much more simpler if I don’t need to choose what to wear each day!
God bless – all the best with your challenge :)
January 24, 2008 at 3:54 pm |
Bonnie, I would love to read your ‘little brown dress’ story. It sounds intriguing.
I’m collecting data for a Skirt post (Dresses coming too), so was delighted to find this page. Thanks for sharing, girls! If you’ve got other favourite skirt/dress stores not mentioned above, please email me!
February 20, 2008 at 5:14 pm |
Hello! I just popped on your site for a quick look-over (got it from an Isaacharian Daughter newsletter) and I spotted this post right away. I started dressing more femininely in late 2006. It was really hard at first, especially since I had only a few skirts/dresses at the time. My mom started wearing dresses not too long after me and that made it a little easier. (both my sisters still wear pants regularly) For awhile I thought I was crazy for deciding to go with it… some days it was hard for me to pick a skirt over a pair of jeans (just because I knew everyone else was wearing jeans). It really has to be an inward conviction from the Lord for it to stick. I’m thankful I made the switch but it hasn’t always been easy! (I finally donated a majority of my pants which ultimately forces me to wear skirts) Getting over how others may view you is difficult but it’s amazing the difference it does make. People, I have found, have more respect. Random men act a little more gentlemanly, women act kinder, and acquaintances see an outward expression of your inward convictions. The best store (I have found) for buying dresses/skirts is Goodwill. Even though I am about the only one (besides my mother) that wears dresses and skirts on a daily basis, I do find it helpful to realize the growing amount of young ladies sharing on the internet that they are too. Sometimes it’s nice to know you’re not the only one, even if you don’t know the others personally. I get uplifted looking at pictures of girls who dress femininely.
[These two families have inspired me time and time again: http://smithfamilia.blogspot.com/ & http://mortonclan.blogspot.com/%5D
May God strengthen you and bless you continually! I look forward to reading more on your site.