Modesty is one of my passions. I love modesty almost as much as I love femininity. (And you’ve all seen how I can write about femininity. I’ve even considered writing a book.) Someday I’m going to do a post of all the benefits of modesty. I love modest clothing, and I love people who wear modest clothing.

Now, the second half of that last sentance…you see that? That’s a problem. I have found it so incredibly easy to be judgemental, even before I meet the person. I’ve doubted girl’s salvation based on their clothing. I’ve had my share of ranting about girls sitting in front of me (or worse yet, when they are sitting in front of a guy) who were wearing tight pants or see through skirts. I do not consider myself the standard of modesty, or as my dad has said “Chief of the Modesty Police!”, but I still have had a judgemental additude.

Why is that wrong? Because, not only is it not always truthful, its prideful, damaging to relationships, and overall- an extremely sinful attitude. When I begin to judge people, I’ve taken modesty way too far. I believe we ladies who are commited to modesty cannot develop this prideful attitude when we see girls who don’t dress like us. Instead, we must teach these girls the importance and blessing of modesty.

How do we do this? I know it may seem strange at first- and you might all ready be thinking about the results you might get. But the first way to teach others about modesty is simple- be modest.

Wear modest clothes and wear them proudly! No, don’t be proud, but when someone asks “Why do you always wear such long skirts?” or “Why are all your tops up to your collerbone?” or even “Where do you buy clothes like that?” it is a great opportunity to share about your modesty convictions. Of course, please do this in a gentle manner, and don’t really be proud! However, don’t mumble something like “My parents make me.” What a waste of a good example when someone says that.

Secondly, with your close friends, and in a manner of gentleness and humility, tell them when something is immodest. Yes, this can be hard, but, if done in a non-judgemental manner, can have very good affects. Many girls don’t want to be immodest, they just don’t know. I did not dress very modestly from age 12-13. There are times where I wish someone had pointed out that what I was wearing was immodest.

Another tip is sharing The Modesty Survey, from the Rebelution with them. An indirect way to do it is post it on your blog/Facebook/or send out an e-mail to many people.

Thirdly, teach the younger girls about modesty. This can very in many different ways, but one thing I do often is if I am playing with or carrying a little girl (age 3 or 4 or so) I go “Oops, I can’t bend over like that. It might be immodest.” or “Can you please move your hand? It could cause my shirt to go a little too low, and we wouldn’t want that to happen!” Funny little comments like that can go a long way in being an example of modesty.

So, ladies, let us not be prideful, modest people but instead strive to be a humble example of modesty.

By His Grace,


Good Books on Modesty-

Christian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America

Secret Keeper- Dannah Gresh (Very good resource to have on hand to lend out.)

Books by Wendy Shalit

And, many resources on


2 Responses to “Modesty”

  1. Anna Joy Says:

    I can totally relate to being too judgmental about another girls clothing. :) Far too often I have assumed that a person is unsaved because of the way she is dressed..only to find out how wrong I was. Great post!

  2. Lana Says:


    Thanks for posting on this topic. I’m sure many of your readers agree with your views on modesty but we often forget about how Christ’s love also shows through those same views in how we treat others.

    I struggle with the same judgmental thoughts.

    PRAISE HIM that our salvation is not based on clothing!!! :)

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